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05/04/2012

If bamboo didn't exist what would you eat instead?

Each other

 

What's it like being a figurehead for the WWF?

Pandas are quite peace loving so being associated with wrestling doesn't particularly sit well with us, but our agent got a cracking deal so we'll live with it

 

What is it like being global sex symbols?

Ironic, seeing as we're currently not doing it

 

How are you dealing with the pressure, what do you do to kick back and relax?

Relax? Mrs P has got a list of DIY jobs as long as a Bamboo shoot, I should be so lucky.

 

How is the Lynx working?

He isn't, he just sits in his enclosure making eyes at Mrs P.

 

Have you read The Little Red Book?

No, but I have a little Black and White one, can I have your number?

 

Any comment on the penguins being re-housed?

Yes, the sooner the better.

 

Any comment on the budget?

No, we're not into pet birds

 

You have ten years to breed in Edinburgh, are you planning a big family?

The only family planning Mrs P has in mind is the type where she doesn't put out.

 

Who would you invite for dinner and why?

Anyone with a spare £250,000

 

To delve a little deeper, how come you are behind bars?

Is it us behind the bars, or you?

 

Any recurring dreams?

Yes, but not any that are suitable for publication in a family magazine

 

Should pandas have human rights?

Humans are never right, everybody knows that

 

Any restaurant or bar that you would like to visit in Edinburgh?

We're quite fond of Chinese, or where we come from just 'food'.

 

What do you think of the food and beer in Scotland?

Buckie is brilliant; it helps you forget the food

 

Pandas live a long time, what is your secret?

Botox and fillers

 

I believe I recently beat Mrs P to the post of 'Woman of the Year' how is she taking it?

I'd step back a little if I were you

 

Is this an exclusive?

Yes, what's our fee?

 

 

Follow on Twitter @TheJockPandas

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